Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. During the 8090s chuck norris was seen by as the american hero. Some little kids like to wear superman costumes until they find out that superman wears a chuck norris costume. The complete chronicle of the worlds deadliest, sexiest, and beardiest man.
Chuck norris walks into a house it then becomes haunted. If you like funny jokes about chuck norris, welcome. Chuck norris jokes best chuck norris jokes, facts, quotes. This is a video capturing the moment on camera, when onision is left behind. Some magicans can walk on water, chuck norris can swim through land. Oct 06, 2009 chuck norris can kick through all 6 degrees of separation, hitting anyone, anywhere, in the face, at any time. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop. The chuck norris jokes started in the summer of 2005 as the result of a thread on the somethingawful forums. Chuck norris facts originally started appearing on the internet in early 2005. Chuck norris halloween facts, funny chuck norris facts. After the deaths of 10 child actors the producers of the show sidekicks decided to cut the scene where chuck norris pats the kid on the back for winning the tournament. Chuck norris did not lose his virginity, he stalked it and then destroyed it with extreme prejudice. Feb 22, 2010 whats the deal with chuck norris jokes. Chuck norris went skydiving and his parachute failed to open, so he took it back the next day for a refund.
Chuck norris was once asked to build the ultimate car, so he spit in the gas tank, and roundhouse kicked the engine block. Chuck norris jokes best chuck norris jokes, facts, quotes and sayings adams hilarious joke books book 10 kindle edition by adam roos. Cnn was originally created as the chuck norris network to update americans with onthespot butt kicking in realtime. The complete chuck norris joke book by robert schneider. May 30, 2008 chuck norris facts originally started appearing on the internet in early 2005. Ironically, chuck norris hidden talent is invisibility. Chuck norris was supposed to be in the movie halloween but the director thought it would be kind of stupid for michael meyers to stab himself in fear. I am neither a racist or have something against other people. This selection of chuck norris jokes will continue to be updated, with the newest jokes at the top, so check back often. Lets read through some offensive jokes with rod danger. Chuck norris jokes a selection of the best 30 jokes. This group is for humorous jokes about chuck norris. Updated regularly to bring you the best jokes and witty one liners on the web. This book is made up of events that occurred in my.
Robert rousseau is a martial arts expert and a former senior writer for mma fighting. Chuck norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head. Chuck norris doesnt bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint. For three years, people from everywhere have inquired in person and by mail about what i think of particular chuck norris facts. When chuck norris walks through a puddle he doesnt get wet, the puddle gets chuck norris. May 09, 20 chuck norris donates blood to the red cross, just not his own. Offensive jokes can be very discriminatory whoever you may be.
Today, that biography is known as the encyclopedia. I love how he starts cracking up at the end tumblr love, chuck norris. Mar 25, 2006 chuck norris invented kentucky fried chickens famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. If you live to see christmas, that is your christmas present from chuck. Strongman and cultural icon chuck norris stars in a fantastic number of oneline jokes on the internet, satirical comments on his portrayal of the ideal martial arts master who never loses a fight or drops a punch. Top 10 best insults, disses, and burns heather best yo mamma so fat jokes top 10 best prank call ideas velilana best chuck norris facts top 10 yo mama jokes ianr632 best yo mama so ugly jokes top 10 funniest insults celestius best blonde jokes top ten funniest asian jokes toptenpizza 10 nastiest april fools day jokes heather top ten yo momma so.
See top 10 chuck norris jokes from collection of 2497 jokes rated by visitors. Hundreds of thousands of humorous chuck norris facts have been published, traveled around the globe via the internet, and gained an international audience. The next day he won the lottery chuck norris memes and jokes shared a photo. I may have accidentally bumped into him a tournament a few years back, although not totally sure. Jul 12, 20 chuck norris doesnt mow his lawn, he dares it to grow. Few celebrities have sparked a cult following like the roundhousekicking chuck norris. Nov 01, 2009 for the first time ever, in the official chuck norris fact book, chuck gives readers not only his favorite facts, roundhousekicked by the man himself, but also the stories behind the facts and the code by which chuck lives his life. Chuck norris fell off his bike once, and the road got chuck rash. Chuck norris can squeeze orange juice out of a lemon. Chuck norris threw a grenade and killed 50 zombies, then it exploded.
Chuck norris jokes best chuck norris jokes, facts, quotes and sayings adams hilarious joke books book 10 kindle edition by roos, adam. Chuck norris once shot an enemy plane down with his finger, by yelling, bang. I just make use of various jokes and thus i also have a category for these offensive jokes. You can find here funniest chuck norris jokes on the world. Simply by pulling on both ends, chuck norris can stretch diamonds back into coal. So, finally, im happy to offer the world the official chuck norris fact book, 101 of my favorite facts, with. Chuck norris gave cats nine lives so he could kill them more. Mar 10, 2016 a year later, though, norris released the official chuck norris fact book, a fullyendorsed collection of chuck norris facts. When chuck norris enters into a courtroom, the judge stands up. Onisionspeaks has fun interesting topics and uhohbro is just a hilarious stuff channel. Comment on top 100 chuck norris jokes superman once had a dream that he spiderman batman and captain america found chuck morris and beat him to death. If he happens to misspell a word, oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it. The action star practically has a second career inspiring memes and jokes, thanks to his tough guy reputation.
Initially distributed in the something awful forums, the facts centered on vin diesel, in response to his film the pacifier. Chuck norris jokes, pictures, and anything that has to do with chuck norris that is worth a laugh or a chuckle. What does chuck norris think about chuck norris jokes. Chuck norris turns 75 today, and the internet is celebrating in recent years, a mythology has sprung up around the action icon, with.
Chuck norris once wrote a biography about his life. When chuck norris plays monopoly, it affects the actual world economy. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. Jokes about the 90s tv character called chuck norris. Fans from every corner of the globe will enjoy both the fanciful and inspirational from one of the world. Chuck norris once broke a mirror over the head of a black cat while standing under a ladder on friday the thirteenth. If it walks like a duck, talks lidek a duck, and smell like a duck but chuck norris says its a girrafe. The paperback of the the official chuck norris fact book. Ive always gotten a kick subtle pun intended out of a good chuck norris joke, or, as theyre more commonly called, the chuck norris facts about the. When chuck norris does a pushup, he isnt lifting himself up. Conan obrien s chuck norris jokes on late night with conan o.
For three years, ive been solicited to write this manuscript. Chuck norris facts followed facts based on actors vin diesel, mr. Chuck norris was once on celebrity wheel of fortune and was the first to spin. Chuck norris was sending an email one day, when he realized that it would be faster to run. I am onision, this is my comedy channel where i put most every comedy sketch. A man that could do no wrong and was made out of solid gold. I knew who chuck norris was and a little of his accomplishments as a martial artist so thought it would be a fun read.
Before science was invented it was once believed that autumn occurred when chuck. Chuck norris facts really funny clean jokes and humor. Hundreds of thousands of humorous chuck norris facts have been published, traveled around the globe via the internet, and gained an international audience of millions. Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell chuck norris stories. I hope you arent affected by some of them and only see the fun in them. Download it once and read it on your kindle device, pc, phones or tablets. Norris is so awesome is that he was just one of the many people in the world who has a black belt in multiple deciplines, i believe and somehow started doing movies and people made up a bunch of awesome jokes about him and thats why hes so epic. Conan obriens chuck norris jokes on late night with conan obrien which generally center on walker, texas ranger have been seen as an inspiration for the fad. When chuck norris does a push up, he doesnt push himself up, he pushes the world down. After a few months, forum members chose chuck norris to be the new subject. To qualify it must paint chuck norris in a positive light and not insult him. Some kids wear superman pajamas, superman wears chuck norris pajamas. Keep in mind that this website with jokes is just for fun.
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